Kiriban I Can t Lose You Again

Give-and-take Count: 2.3k

Warnings: Mentions of death, blood, and injuries

A/N: Happy Holidays everyone, information technology's time for another @irondad-fic-exchange​ This year I got paired with the lovely @spideysforce and from their prompts I've chosen:

• The team (or just Peter and Tony) during and after an intense mission - how they recuperate, hugs, clean their wounds, argue over the mission. Peter fights an internal battle with himself/trauma.

Really loved working on this one <iii Hope you savor information technology!

Originally posted by byblackswan

There was an eerie silence within the Quinjet; no one daring to utter a discussion to other swain teammates. Anybody sat in their own horrific worlds, the mission still weighing heavy on their souls. It was a constant reminder of merely how precious life was - how things could modify within a millisecond.

They had lived through this trauma before and notwithstanding they almost lost information technology all again.

Aliens , it had always been an otherworldly threat. Some new species, some tyrant trying to take Earth for their own. It didn't matter that Thanos had been defeated or the Avengers were slowly trying to reassemble the cleaved remains left in the wake of their own vision of the Civil War. Another threat was upon them, reigning down devastation in hopes of doing what the Titan had wanted.

But this time, it wasn't Thanos and his regular army of Chitauri; it was another race of conflicting creatures intertwined with mechanical enhancements making them much deadlier than imagined.

________

Natasha'due south panicked vocalism echoed through comms. "Where's my air support?!" She grunts, a painful hiss escaping her equally some animal roars in the altitude. Gunshots echo, explosions everywhere.  "We're getting overrun here!"

She meant herself along with Bucky and Sam. A newly formed trio after Steve took a pace back from his role of Helm America and after Clint – sacrificed himself for the soul stone. They've worked well together since the events of Berlin years ago, a perfect team for smaller missions. But nowadays, other planets were aware of the heroes within World; the mightiest heroes that defended their planet against an all-powerful titan and his army.

They wanted a slice of the action themselves, a gamble to defeat the Avengers.

Peter had been midway report prep for his college physics exam when notifications began clarion on his phone. An emergency alert for all agile Avengers to get together, a distress phone call coming from the trio sent in to cheque out a foreign signal coming from the outskirts of the city.

Information technology was a portal waiting to exist open up, a "gift" waiting to be unleashed by the very heroes guarding the planet.

He instinctively swung from his apartment, kissing his girlfriend, Michelle for good luck. They never kissed goodbye; a modest agreement between them to make sure they come back to each other at the cease of the day. They were both expressionless once before and they didn't want to repeat that until many years later on.

Peter expected the usuals to provide aid, the current team assembling to stop any threat that was virtually to overrun his friends. And yet, he stumbled into an odd and worrying image of people that should be long retired by now.

Steve , the bearded man dawning his Nomad conform, simply made in dire situations and-

Tony.

His mentor, his father effigy, i of the many people he would practise annihilation to protect suiting upwards once again; Iron Man gracing the world for another day. Peter'due south breath hitches at the sight, a flood of memories and trauma washing over him.

"Mr. Stark? Tony?"

His mentor but stared, burn scars creeping upwards his arm and neck. His animate faltered, optics in a haze as he struggled to course a sentence.

Peter tried to take his hand, the panic and emotions clutching his lungs. The sobs erupted as he begged the man to say; a near-identical image of Ben moments away from his expiry playing out in front of him.

The image scared deep in his mind, the panic forever looming over him. It didn't matter that Tony had survived; how people among the likes of Carol, Dr. Cho, and Shuri were able to bring him from the brink of death. His mentor, his 2nd pseudo-father almost died; scars nonetheless stretching upwards his arm and neck – a constant reminder of what could have happened.

And this human being was throwing himself back into the fray once more.

Peter felt the bile rise in his pharynx, muffled explosions rippling from the sight of the portal. Other teammates were addressing the city, doing their job as he stood there and stared. The acid stings against his pharynx, oral cavity going dry.

Panic and worry clutched his lungs like a snake, the constant what-ifs matched with a recurring nightmare replaying in his head.

Tony could die this time–

He could actually–

These aliens could actually be the very thing that–

"Wheels upwards in 2, Pete!" Steve's voice echoes beyond the hanger, both men just realizing his presence. Tony doesn't notice his demeanor, brows furrowed as he fiddles around with FRIDAY and his suit. The homo urges him frontwards. "Scott and Hope simply touched down and Rhodey is accessing the surrounding city. It'due south all hands on deck by the looks of information technology."

"What are we-" Peter grows distracted past his mentor once more than, Tony ruffling his curls like it was the one-time days of team-ups. "How bad is this invasion?"

"FRIDAY is running scans now but hopefully if nosotros can get that portal closed, the remaining freaks will be easy to take down," Tony chimed in, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "Yous know this reminds me of our niggling team-ups; Iron Man and Spidey taking down the bad guys of New York."

He did besides but more and so the fact of how unproblematic his life used to be back and so. There wasn't some constant threat of aliens invading, subconscious dangers lurking effectually each corner. Now, he was nineteen – technically twenty-iv if he wasn't dead for five years – and a vastly different person than he was when he got his powers at fourteen.

He missed the simplicities; the lack of horrid memories from his time on titan and the years to follow.

But Peter pushed the panic and worry straight downwardly, plastering on a smile like this was a normal occurrence. They had a city and possible world to save, he couldn't let his ain selfish need of protecting his mentor go far the fashion.

"Sure," He heaves, patting Tony's shoulder. "I'm sure Pepper loves the idea of you putting on the accommodate over again."

"I estimate we all tin't escape with this type of chore. Nosotros're all called back to it ane 24-hour interval."

"Life of a superhero," Peter sighs. "Always full of surprises."

"At present," His mentor smirks, ruffling his curls once again. "Let's kicking some conflicting ass, I want to be home by dinner."

They weren't.

Peter'due south fists stayed clenched, knuckles white and aching. His body runs off pure adrenaline, pushing past his teammates with an urgency. A mixture of anger and terror swirled within him, biting memories bubbles up to the surface.

I don't wanna go, I don't—

He collides with a cold surface, snapping him out of his terror fueled daze. The door to the Medbay opens, a clean and sterile surface area well-nigh to exist ruined. Peter'due south adrenaline lowers enough for him to experience the throbbing pain in his side; the bruises and cuts his trunk was trying desperately to heal.

Desperately he clings to the nearest starting time aid kit, fist finally unclenching as he fumbles for some bandages. His mind forms a list; important tasks to non transport him over the edge.

He needed to nourish to his injuries.

He doesn't need to retrieve nearly—

He needs to be quick—

He nearly, he most—

A hand touches his shoulder, causing Peter to blanch. The bandages tumble to the floor bloody and tangled. His breath hitches, the panic, the terror, the memories all trying to surface. Tony watches him through worried optics, brows furrowed.

"Kiddo talk to me."

Peter bites his tongue, burnished eyes scanning the injured form of his mentor and pseudo father effigy. The metal arm catches his attention; slightly dented, charred from the fight. Claret cakes Tony's forehead, makeshift bandages covering his own injuries. Soot covers his mentor's features, sulfur lingering in the air.

He heaves, tears threatening to spill.

Don't pause down hither, don't break down in front of—

"Peter," Tony sounds desperate, hand trying to achieve out.

Peter tries to speak but memories crash downwards upon him like a tidal moving ridge. The countless hours, days, weeks of watching Tony with May hoping that somehow he could wake up from his coma. The stones had well-nigh taken his life, doctors unsure if he would even wake up.

When did finally open his eyes, finally leaving the halls of the Medbay — Tony promised one matter. He was done, retiring; taking a footstep back from the Avengers.

And all the same, the moment aliens descend on the metropolis his mentor was back to his same onetime antics — sacrificing himself for the greater good.

Peter about lost him over again.

"Don't!" His voice booms through the Medbay, bloody mitt smacking Tony's away. Tears freely fall, panic breaths escaping. "Only don't."

"Pete," Tony keeps his voice calm, easily hovering simply an inch away. "Kiddo, I know things got bad dorsum there simply we're all fine-"

"Fine?!" He snaps back tugging at his curls. He heaves roughly rubbing the tear off his face. "Fine is coming out unscathed, not half of the squad needing medical attending!"

"Only none of them are life-threatening," Tony offers worried eyes trying to figure out a mode to condolement him.

"You only don't get it."

The anxiety curls around Peter's lungs, his head swimming with overwhelming thoughts. Tony didn't understand, he didn't accept whatsoever idea how much his latest stunt scared him.

"What don't I get Peter?"

"Just," He scrambles to pick upward the bandages, hissing from the pain. "It doesn't matter."

"Well, it matters to yous so it matters to me."

"Tony," He pleads. "Drop it."

"Peter, something is upsetting you. Tell me what information technology-"

The emotions erupt.

"You!" He yells, tears freely falling as his trunk shakes. Sobs tumble out uncontrollably, his fists dorsum into tight fists.

Tony stands at that place stunned, brows furrowed trying to piece together what he did wrong. "Kiddo-"

"Y-You promised that yous were done. Only to determine to put on a suit," The words tumble out. "And and then you recklessly drive into the fight head commencement-"

"Peter," His mentor grabs him holding his shaking form.

"No, no-" Peter pulls back. "You almost died again!" His vocalisation echoes through the room, eyes bittersweet.

"Kid, I-" His mentor stumbles for the right words, looking quite distressed himself. "Look, I know scared everybody back there. Only sometimes someone has to make the cede play to-"

"And I tin't lose you once again!" Peter heaves, bitter memories replaying over and over once again.

Titan.

The final boxing.

All ending with the loss of innocence.

Peter saw the earth in a new light, a clock counting backward until it strikes zip. Everything around him had their ain clock, their own countdown to the twenty-four hours they would leave him.

But Tony liked to play with time. He had a knack for cutting his time in half, doubling it soon after he made a big play on his life. Information technology was an ongoing cycle of fear bottled until it finally exploded.

"I-I can't watch you throw your life away like it's nothing."

"Child-"

"No!" Peter roughly shoves his chests, body trembling. "Yous act like the world would exist improve without yous in it but the truth is that information technology would be terrible. Terrible for everyone including me."

Peter takes a deep breath, burnished eyes begging Tony.

"Y'all can't sacrifice your life simply to salve me."

The room deafens with a suffocating silence. Peter continues to shake in his place, tears rolling downwardly his confront. His mentor watches him with his ain torment, swirling thoughts hiding behind his bawling brownish eyes. The age shows on the man's face, the years all of the sudden weighing heavily.

"Pete, I-" Tony clears his pharynx, eyes just equally bloodshot equally his.

He sniffles, free hand wiping away a stray tear. His mentor's touch on never fully leaves him, a constant mitt, basis him – grounding the both of them.

"When y'all…you-" The words struggled to grade. "Disappeared."

"Died," He corrects, the familiar sting of his body aging resurfacing.

Tony stares hauntingly. "You were gone, kiddo. All in a matter of seconds ." His voice cracks, left hand trembling. "Five years I spent running over scenarios, running over what I did incorrect. Because a slice of my centre was missing and that slice was you."

"Tony-"

"No," Tony cuts him off, hand trembling, "I knew the moment I got you lot back I would do anything, anything to go on you alive."

Peter matches his gaze. "And what near me," He pressed a finger into his mentor'southward chest, heaving as the emotions bubbled up to the surface once more. "What nigh when I watched you dice just to be resuscitated into a coma?!"

His vox echoes, Tony letting him air his frustration.

"You were lifeless for weeks, weeks . Every twenty-four hour period I woke up expecting May or Pepper to tell me yous–" A sob erupts from his lips, hands desperately trying to wipe the tears from his optics. His trunk trembles, quite whimpers following. "died…Tony, y'all should have–"

Tony this fourth dimension breaks the altitude betwixt them, engulfing his shaking grade into a tight hug. A few sniffles escape his mentor, tears falling into his curls. Peter clutches onto his mentor, trembling fingers keeping him virtually – making certain he was really here breathing.

"Kiddo," Tony hushes, kissing the crown of his caput. "I'm here, I'thousand right here."

"Y-You can't-" He hiccups. "Y-You tin can't die."

"Pete," His mentor gently brushes the curls from his eyes, a sadness lingering in his vocalization. "Nosotros all eventually-" Peter stills from the annotate, grip tightening. Tony stops himself, a heavy sigh escaping. "I'll do my best, I promise."

Peter swallows another lump in this throat wishing his mentor could requite him more; to requite him a meliorate form of a hope. Simply deep down he knows this is the best someone in this line of work could give their loved ones. Their life was in a never-catastrophe cycle of adventure, with i mean solar day of their luck running out.

"I'll e'er come back," Tony hunkers down on his promise. "I will always find a way back to my family."

"You scared me" Peter whispers, refusing to let get simply yet. "But I'one thousand sorry I yelled."

"In that location'south nothing to be sorry for, Pete."

"I love you."

Tony chuckles, wet laugher filling the once tense room. "I love you too, kiddo."

________

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Source: https://rejectedmarvel.tumblr.com/post/637871277193969664/and-i-cant-lose-you-again